Kicking and Screaming
by ShiftyShrike
Summary: Oh God! Yet another GiME story! The horror! But this lady doesn't take it too well; the last thing she wants is to be stuck in a world with no toilet paper.
1. So Undignified

Oh God! Yet another GiME story! The horror! But this tomboy doesn't take it too well; the last thing she wants is to be stuck in a medieval-era world with no toilet paper. I'm sticking as close as I can to the movie plots, well, as close as I can with adding another character…

Disclaimer: Lord of the Rings, story, and characters do not belong to me. Andrew Volpe belongs to LUDO (hahaa). Everything else is mine. MINE! My preciousssss….

I haven't written anything in about a year, so I apologize in advance. This is a fic I'm writing in my spare time, between work and classes, merely for my own enjoyment. Rated PG-13 for violence, drinking, and profanity. May or may not have romance later, it depends how I feel. :p

Chapter One

Reyna slumped in her chair, the light from her laptop glaring in her heavy-lidded eyes. She was tired. Very tired. Her bed seemed to call to her, so soft and inviting. But she had to finish her essay; it was due in the morning. Silently she cursed herself, why did she always wait till the last minute to write these damn things? _One more year, one more year, then I wont have to write another essay ever again…_ she thought, stopping her incessant tapping of the keys to rub her eyes. She glanced at the clock on her desk; it read 2:00AM.

"uuuurrrghhh…"

Reyna just wanted to bang her head on the desk repeatedly until blessed unconsciousness overtook her. Her cell phone suddenly blared to life, the shouting Andrew Volpe startling her out of her reverie. Reyna dived for her phone and answered it.

"Hello?" she said in a raspy sort of way.

The commotion on the other end of the phone was so loud it made her head pound; she held the phone away from her ears.

"Helllooooo!" A voice answered her, a very much intoxicated voice. "Hey Rey, what's you doin' girl?" the girl on the other end yelled into the phone.

Reyna furrowed her brows, a drunk roommate was the last thing she needed right now.

"I'm doing homework right now. I have class in the morning."

"Damn, Reyna, it's Friday night! I can't believe you're sitting at home."

"Yeah, well, some of us actually care about the future." Reyna said testily, her patience wearing thin.

"What do you want Kath?"

"weeeeell… see our designated driver got totally smashed. Oh my God, It was sooo funny! There was this guy wearing-"

"Kath!" Reyna shouted, bringing her back before she could stray off topic into one of her stories. Reyna already knew what she wanted though.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, we need a ride."

Reyna groaned loudly, simultaneously thinking about telling her friend to get a cab. But her groan turned into a sigh.

"Fine. "

"Thanksss babe!" Her roommate hung up.

Silence reigned for a few minutes while Reyna sat there, glaring at her laptop. Her roommate was at a party an hour away, there was no way she was going to get her essay done tonight. She knew it was her own fault for starting her it so late. But still, she was pissed off. Grumbling to herself, she grabbed her keys and wallet and stomped to the door. For a split second she contemplated slamming it behind her, but she didn't want to wake the neighbors.

"Fuck my courtesy." She said out loud while she locked the door.

A few minutes later she was zooming down the highway, windows down, blasting LUDO. Once the warm night air hit her face, her troubled seemed to melt away, dissolve into the night. If there was one thing she loved, it was driving fast with the wind whipping her short, black hair.

WHAM!

Suddenly a car crashed into her. She was jerked violently sideways; she gasped and slammed on the brakes. She swerved, her car made an awful grinding sound, metal against metal. Then her car flipped, and she rolled down a ditch. Reyna let out a cry as a stabbing pain shot through her, her head hit the steering wheel and she blacked out.

There was a light.

_Oh my God, I'm dead. _

The light came closer.

_There's the light at the end of the tunnel. I'm fuckin' dead._

The light was almost upon her.

_No wait, I have to pee. I can't be dead, unless people still pee in the afterlife…_

There was that stabbing pain again.

_Ow, ow, ow, no, I'm definitely alive. Ow._

The light enveloped her and slowly Reyna opened her eyes. She closed them again as the light was blinding. Tentatively she opened her eyes again, squinting. It was the sun.

_Damn, was I lying here all night? No one found me in the ditch? I had a car accident and no one called an ambulance or anything?_

Indignation and anger surged inside her; no one had found her yet? What about the other car? Were they alright? Groaning, Reyna attempted to sit up to inspect herself. She gasped as pain shot through her body, she felt like throwing up. Finally she got into a sitting position and looked around.

"What-?"

This wasn't the ditch she rolled into; in fact, she wasn't in a ditch at all. She was in a forest, next to a pond. She blinked a few times and stared dumbly around at her surroundings. There was no highway in sight. Reyna thought maybe she had been thrown quite a ways from her car, but quickly discarded this idea; she probably wouldn't have survived that. She looked down, finding the source of the pain. Reyna was not one to get grossed out over much of anything, especially blood. And she'd had her share of injuries in the past. But the sight before her caused a wave of nausea to pass over her. A piece of metal, from her car most likely, was embedded in her lower right stomach. She gingerly lifted her shirt, pulling it away from the metal shard, to inspect the damage. It really wasn't in deep, not enough to affect any of her vital organs anyway. Reyna took off her jacket and balled it up, then, gritting her teeth, she grasped the metal tightly and yanked it out. She let out a low yell that winded its way into a grunt. Blood poured from her wound; she pressed her jacket against it. She needed to get to a hospital, but where was the nearest one? She didn't recognize this place at all. _Well,_ she thought, _I'd better start walking and try to find something. I do not want to bleed to death in a forest. It's so undignified._

With many grunts and gasps and a bit of dizziness she made it to her feet and started walking. Which way, she didn't know.

She walked for what seemed hours, feeling weaker with every step. Her stomach injury had stopped bleeding so much, but she kept her jacket pressed on it. Other than that, she didn't have any other grievous injuries, just a small cut on her forehead where her head had hit the steering wheel and a few other bruises here and there. Really she was quite lucky she didn't have any broken bones.

The sun streamed down through the trees, dancing on the mossy forest floor. It would've been beautiful to her in any other circumstance, but Reyna was swaying dangerously with every step and her vision was becoming hazy. Apprehension was creeping in her stomach, why hadn't she come to a road or a town yet? Where the hell was she?

Reyna then came to a small clearing; ahead of her was a dirt road. She almost peed herself with happiness. A goofy, dazed look came over her; she stumbled forward, still clutching her stomach. The sight that greeted her made her whiten. Instead of a town, or anything resembling a town in Indiana, there were rolling, green hills, and most with strange doors in the sides. Reyna blinked a few times and promptly passed out.


	2. Ain't No Party Like a Hobbit Party

(AN) Gah, update. I run pretty quickly through this part, cause I'm really trying to get to the fellowship part, hurf durf. I just wanted Reyna to know Frodo and build a friendship, instead of stumbling into Rivendell suddenly like "oh hey, you guys just met me, but I'm coming with you on your quest to save the world!" So yeah.

Thank you to my reviewers and the peeps who faved/watched this. You're awesome!

As you'll probably notice, my biggest problem is the whole "show, don't tell" deal. I'm working on it, but hey, I'm not going for a Pulitzer here.

Also, life is killing me. I'm soooo tired. But, you guys didn't come here to listen to me moan, here's the story, even though I really don't know why you would want to read it. It'll make your eyes BLEED. Fair warning. Continue on.

Chapter 2

This time Reyna didn't awaken slowly, no, her eyes flew open and she jerked into an upright position, inhaling sharply. She was in a softly-lit room with a low ceiling. It had a homey feel to it, and smelled like dirt. She clutched her stomach and winced, as the all too familiar twinge of pain jolted through her again.

"You're awake!" someone exclaimed, Reyna turned her head and saw a small man standing beside the bed she was on. He had curly brown hair and the most startling blue eyes she had ever seen. He looked somehow familiar. And he was SO SHORT! I mean, Reyna herself was only 4'11", but this guy could only be around four feet.

"You don't look well, you should lie down. That's a nasty gash you've come by." The man said. Reyna nodded stupidly and lay back down, staring at the ceiling. The man hovered nervously beside her.

"Thanks." Reyna finally said.

The man seemed taken aback, "huh?"

"Thanks for rescuing me and bandaging me up." Reyna was speaking softly, still in shock slightly.

"Ah, you're most welcome. Though I'm not the one who did the rescuing."

"Oh."

There was a few minutes of silence, then the man spoke again, obviously asking a question he'd been wanting to for a while.

"Who are you? I mean to say, I've never seen anyone dressed like you before. Where are you from? I mean- uh…" He trailed off, looking a bit abashed that he had bombarded her with questions.

"Before I answer, could you answer a few questions of mine first?"

"Of course."

"This may seem silly but, where am I?"

A look of confusion flickered across the man's face.

"You're in the Shire."

"Oh…." Reyna said in a hollow tone. That's why he seemed so familiar, he was Frodo. Frodo Baggins the Hobbit. From Lord of the Rings. He looked remarkably like Elijah wasn't possible; it was like something out of a fanfic. Sure, she had read fanfics about girls falling into Middle Earth, hell she had even fantasized about it once in a while. But it just wasn't possible. It was scientifically impossible. Maybe it was the car crash, maybe the impact had thrown her through time and space. But still, LotR was fictional! It just wasn't possible! Reyna's mind raced, she breathed rapidly.

The man was confused now. "I can assure you you're not dead." He didn't understand why the girl was getting so upset "Please calm down."

Reyna willed herself to breath normally; there was no use in panicking. What she needed in this situation was a clear head. She breathed deeply for a few seconds, clearing her mind and thinking up a story to tell Frodo.

"Ah, sorry about that." She said finally, "I'm traveler, from very, VERY, far away, to the East. I doubt you've heard of it. That's why I didn't know where I was, we don't know of this land where I'm from, which is why I'm travelling, I'm an explorer."

Reyna finished her spiel and prayed that Frodo would buy it, hoping that she could claim to have come from the Sun-Lands if he pressed the issue further. Luckily he didn't.

"You're travelling alone?" He asked, looking worried.

Reyna felt a twinge of annoyance, "are you asking that because I'm a woman?"

Frodo looked abashed, "Well, it's just-"

Reyna cut him off "Where I'm from, women do everything men do. We are equal." Before he could say anything else, Reyna sat up. The pain in her stomach was intense, but not enough to keep her down. Having a very high threshold for pain, Reyna was one to disregard her injuries to the point of making them immensely worse. A flaw that irritated her mother to no end. Reyna swung her feet over the bed and planted them firmly on the ground; Frodo did his best to plead with her to lay back down, but to no avail. Reyna gingerly eased herself off the bed and onto her legs. She swayed a bit at first, but soon got her bearings. Her plan was to make it back to the spot where she arrived, maybe there was some weird portal she came through that she didn't see before. Frodo followed her to the door, looking apprehensive. Reyna turned to him and smiled,

"Thanks very much for letting me rest here, it was kind of you. But I must go." She turned and grabbed the handle on the door, pulling the door open with a bit of effort. She walked a few steps and realized Frodo was following her. Reyna huffed exasperatedly and turned to face him.

"Why are you following me?" she asked bluntly. Frodo seemed taken aback, he arched an eyebrow.

"You're wounded, it would dishonor me to let you walk unattended. You really should rest more."

In a fashion similar to her grandmother, Reyna flapped her hands to shoo him away.

"Seriously dude, I'll be fine. I've walked off worse injuries. I'm not a child."

Yet again she turned to walk away. And yet again Frodo followed her. Though slightly annoyed, Reyna felt a little pleased. He was quite the gentleman. They walked a few steps until Reyna realized she had no idea where she was.

"Er… where did you find me?" She asked while glancing around. The scenery all looked the same to her, and she needed to find where she had passed out before.

"Oh, I didn't find you; you were simply brought to my home to recuperate."

Reyna pursed her lips, "Who found me then?"

"Gandalf the Grey."

The normally pale Reyna flushed, "oh great." She murmured, "my first encounter with the great wizard and I'm passed out and bleeding all over the place. How wonderful."

Frodo didn't seem to have heard her, but he had noticed her sudden change in attitude.

"Something wrong?" he asked. "Do you know Gandalf?"

Reyna thought quickly, she didn't want to let on that she knew everything that was going to happen and knew about everything and everyone. She decided it was best to act like she knew nothing, keep up the premise of a traveler from afar, and just let it play out.

"No." she said finally "Not personally anyway, I might have heard his name in passing. Stories, that sort of thing."

Frodo nodded, and they stood in awkward silence for a minute before Frodo proposed that Reyna come back to his abode and waited until Gandalf showed up, so that she may ask him.

Reyna agreed, though a bit reluctantly, and followed him back inside. When Reyna was seated Frodo went about making tea. They talked for a while, well, mostly Reyna talked. Frodo had begun asking her questions about her travels, and Reyna tried her best to come up with various stories. She was beginning to run out of ideas when Frodo suddenly leapt out of his seat, like he had been burned. Reyna had almost jumped out of her skin at this sudden movement.

"What the hell man!" she yelled.

"I am sorry; I'm late for birthday party. Please, would you care to accompany me?"

Reyna knew exactly whose birthday party it was, and of course she wanted to attend.

"I'd be delighted sir." She said with a smile, but then frowned. She wasn't dressed for a party, well, her pants were still ok, but her shirt was bloody and torn.

"Uh… I don't suppose you had a shirt I could wear? Would you?"

After Reyna had been outfitted with a nice, white shirt of Frodo's, which fit quite nicely, they headed off towards the lights and noise that could only be a party. At first, Frodo had proposed that Reyna visit his neighbor and acquire a dress to wear, a proposal that was squashed flat by Reyna. She was NOT wearing a dress. That was one thing she would not allow while here in Middle Earth. She knew how much running was in her future, and her loose-fitting jeans suited her for that purpose just fine. Assuming that she as stuck here.

Reyna had been to many a party, but no party she had ever attended was as fun as the party she was at now. Hobbits knew how to party! She especially liked the dancing, and the alcohol, of course. While she couldn't dance herself for fear of ripping her stitches, she watched with great amusement, really wishing she could join in.

Frodo introduced her to a few hobbits, including Sam, whom she immediately took a liking to. Frodo also introduced her to Gandalf, though briefly, as he excused himself to light fireworks. In all the fun and alcohol Reyna had completely forgotten to ask Gandalf where he had found her. In fact, all thoughts of getting home had vanished, she wasn't worried about school, or work, or anything really. She just had pure fun.

Then came time for Bilbo to give his speech, a grimness fell over Reyna as she realized the end of party was nigh. Bilbo started his speech, he disappeared, and everyone started panicking, as Reyna knew they all would. She looked around for Gandalf, he was gone, probably already at Bilbo's house ready to confront him. She then searched the crowd for Frodo; she found him only a few yards away, looking stunned. She moved towards him as he stood. He started running, and Reyna started to follow. She didn't get very far, as her wound was hurting her again.

As she slowed to a hurried walk she began to think. Did she really want to get involved? She should just try to find the place where she had entered this world and try to get home. She knew there was no chance of asking Gandalf now, as he was going to ride of to Minas Tirith and all. But she could still try to find a way back home. Though maybe it was like a video game, maybe if she played through and made it to the end she would be sent home.

Reyna's sighed, for a moment she thought about staying in Middle Earth. But she pounded down this thought, berating herself as she did so. She could NOT live forever without indoor plumbing and toilet paper! Reyna wasn't one to moan and groan when she had to do her business while camping or the like, but she couldn't bear the thought of never having toilet paper ever again. Almost as importantly, she had a life back on Earth. She was in college, had friends, she eventually wanted to marry and have her own family. She needed to get back no matter what.

She arrived at Bag End after what felt like hours. The door was open so she peeked inside. Frodo was sitting in a chair by the fire, looking contemplative. Gandalf was already gone it seemed. A few seconds ticked by as Reyna shifted uneasily, while clutching her stomach which was causing her a bit of pain. She was unsure if she should enter, or sit outside, or… really she had no idea what she should do at this time. As she turned to leave, she stubbed her toe on the door jam. A stream of whispered curses flowed from her mouth, causing Frodo to snap out of his reverie and look up.

"Reyna!" he called, suddenly standing and making his way towards her. Taking notice of Reyna holding her stomach, and her obvious pained expression, he held out his hand.

"Come sit! I'm sorry; I had disregarded the fact that you were injured."

Reyna reluctantly took his hand and allowed him to lead her to the chair he had been sitting in.

"Ah, I'm fine, really." Reyna said, "I've had worse."

"Really?" Frodo was busy making tea for both of them, "I would love to hear more about your adventures. Being a traveler must be exciting."

A grimace passed over Reyna's face before quickly being replaced with a false smile. "Sure, I would love to relate some of my… adventures."

The night passed with Frodo assailing Reyna with questions about her travels and home, which she did her best to make up. She had the vague impression that his questioning was really to keep his mind of what had happened that evening. He was worried about Bilbo, and the ominous words of Gandalf's. _Poor guy_, Reyna thought, this thought just made her feel even more horrible lying to him. A few hours crawled by, but when a yawn finally broke free from Reyna, Frodo suggested they retire for the night. He insisted that she stay with him until she had recuperated.

And stay she did. Weeks went by. Gandalf still hadn't returned. Reyna figured that this would be the case though, since how he was traveling horseback, not by jet. But it still irritated her immensely, seeing how she still had not been able to ask him where he found her. Though at this point she had pretty much thrown out that whole plan, instead spending her time wandering all over the Shire, searching for anything that could possibly lead her back home. She did this much to the chagrin of Frodo, who kept up a persistent request for her to rest. It was futile though, she always ended up helping with the housework, and then going back to her endless searching of the Shire. Reyna searched for weeks and weeks, her hope of ever returning home slowly fading.

Then, one night while she was still out on her search, Gandalf finally returned.


End file.
